Matriarch

Definition of Matriarch: The mother and ruler of a family

or of her descendants; a ruler by maternal right.

I knew it would be the last time our eyes would meet. The last time I’d hold her hand, hear her speak my name. I wondered if all the years and the miles had somehow faded who I was to her. Did she remember all we shared…all she’d been to me?

But then her smile confirmed it; her wit and humor, even in her feeble frame with pink gown and rocking chair…the rise and fall of memories still breathing deep, still vivid and alive and my heart danced with her ice-blue eyes. The connection made – hearts embraced.

When the news came this week that she’d breathed her last and gone home to be with Jesus, the word “matriarch” chimed loud and strong, and I struggled with its meaning. The word, a sharp contrast to a beautiful, pure spirit lived out not in capital letters but with humble, simple words. A life without flourish – without pretense, yet in a sense, as a matriarch nonetheless. She held unspoken power, distinction, honor. A matriarch of a different nature, though Grandma would never own it.

I have to believe that there are others like her; those who prefer the sidelines giving support to those on center stage. Those who aren’t about title, recognition or gain, living practically instead of radically.

“Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”

(Titus 2:3-5) NIV

To me, “Matriarch” couldn’t be defined any better.

The Memory of You

Three years later, and the memory of her still burns just as fresh today. Striking and poised, she sat alone with her silver-grey hair tucked beneath broad-rimmed hat and matching cape all in red sipping tea from a dainty, white cup. She occupied not a quiet corner table, but one in the middle of the candle-light and champagne glasses and bustling waiters in black.

It was our last night in Paris – our last night on the most romantic, whirl-wind trip that far exceeded even my dreams.

We’d come in out of the cold December rain and shook off coats and scarves at a quaint table in Angelina. My husband, handsome and ordering in rehearsed French, and I absorbing every finite detail of the moment. I sat breathing it all in; the flicker of candle-light through champagne glasses. The heady mingling of fragrances hanging heavy; French perfume, fine cuisine, romance and allure – a moment captured and savored on the tongue.

I want to be that for Jesus.

Someday, when I’ve gone home to be with Him, I want to be remembered as that woman sitting in the middle of the chaos, the noise and activity determined to be a light for Jesus. I want to shine for Him and to go about it confidently. While life is going on around me, I want others to see His light through me and know that it's meant for us all, not an exclusive few – and that His light pierces through the busiest, deepest, darkest places.

And it’s meant to shine through you.

You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

(Matthew 5:14-16) NIV

Glory

The rain started heavy this morning beating against the roof and filling the dark of early morning with sounds of renewal and rebirth – the glorious cleansing that makes all things new. The fresh scent, even before the light of day, drifted in through open window and dancing curtains; all proof of God’s power to summon the storm through darkness and light.

I thought about people who spend their lives much the same way; people who simply do, not looking for or needing the light to shine on their efforts.

A sharp contrast to those who compete for the light taking glory meant for the Lord to fulfill their empty pride.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

(Romans 8:28) NIV

We’re not competing if we’re truly for God. When our hearts are in line with His plan and purpose, we realize that ALL which is meant for His glory will indeed glorify HIM – it’s not FOR us to own. He’s already given so much – who am I to claim glory from the One who has already suffered and died for me?

The competition begins when we shift the focus FROM God to our own pride.

Still, the rain falls in both light and dark. It doesn’t need to be seen to have impact.

The Courage to Fly – Part 6: “Share Your Journey with Others”

Final thoughts…

Sharing lessons learned along the way could be of great value to someone embarking on a similar journey. But what if after all the dreaming, planning, praying, researching, believing and sacrificing…you’re still on this side of the mountain? What if God’s timing has you frustrated and anxious about accomplishing all you’ve worked so hard for?

Remember that success is in the doing. It’s in the act of making that decision to move forward, and in the highs and lows of it all you learn more about yourself and more about the awesome power of the God who loves you like NO other. It’s in placing your complete trust in His plan, and finding rest in doing so.

Whatever knowledge you’ve gained along the way; whatever experiences have shaped you or your mindset, there’s bound to be someone standing at the starting gate of their dreams and goals who would benefit from your story. So, share the process. Share your prayers and share your praise for the giver of dreams!

If you fully obey the LORD your God and carefully follow all his commands I give you today, the LORD your God will set you high above all the nations on earth. All these blessings will come on you and accompany you if you obey the LORD your God: (Deuteronomy 28:1-2) NIV

You Can't Do it Alone!

My little voice of negativity is a roaring lioness these days. She wakes me somewhere around 4am growling as I fight for sleep, snarling me awake with fears and doubts until I rise to begin the day already beaten and deep into worry.

Somewhere in the dark, I find my praise; mutter my faith in the One who casts light on my dark morning. But my whisper is no match for the strength of the beast when she’s determined to claim my joy and win over my dreams.

She breathes hot across my neck words of failure, disappointment… discouragement. I deflect her negative jabs and rub my eyes as I walk the cold tile floor to the coffee pot. She’s relentless in her pursuit, stalking, stirring up emotions and old memories, all the reasons to stop and retreat, to take cover and hide beneath the shelter of my insecurities.

My cup clangs to the counter and I give in to the hunt.

“I can’t do this!” I cry out. “This is too much for me – the task is too big…too great. Who in the world do I think I am, anyway? I just can’t…”

But the lioness is a coward and I am humbled as we’re both silenced there…in the very presence of Him.

And I hear, “You’re right – YOU alone can’t do it.”

So, it’s time to live out what I profess. It turns out the challenge is mine, as suddenly “The Courage to Fly” is a pretty steep mountain to conquer.

But if my God can tame the lioness and send her running, He surely has the power that equips and strengthens – the power that guides me forward and fills me with the joy of knowing Him.

I’m praising God today for opportunities that grow us. I’m thanking Him for moments such as these where our faith rises up larger than we are and sends our lioness running back to her dark cave. His strength in my weakness. More of Him – less of me. The Way, the Truth and the Life that fuels our courage to fly!

Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.

(1 Peter 5:8) NIV

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.

(John 10:10) NIV

"The Courage to Fly" Part 5 - Don't Be Deterred by Opposition!

I had to look twice at the jogger who paced impatiently on the corner waiting for the traffic to flow so he could safely cross the street. There was definitely something different about him as he bobbed and moved. That’s when I realized the man had no legs! His prosthetic devices began somewhere above the knees and continued down to his running shoes with long, preformed metal bars. I watched him and immediately wondered about the effort of simply getting out of bed in the morning, or showering, or driving a car, or even bending over to hug a child. Simple things to those of us blessed with full use of our limbs, but no doubt a real challenge to that man.

I continued on through the intersection feeling very small.

I’d learned a huge lesson and not a word was spoken.

I found myself saying, “What is your excuse, Debbie? You have everything in working order, so why can’t/don’t you accomplish what you’ve set out to do? What in the world is holding you back from being all that God designed you to be?” Suddenly, my excuses faded away in the blur of tail lights and I realized there will always be opposition. For every positive, we have to expect a negative, but we have to decide which is bigger to us. Which is more important? Which deserves more of our time and effort; looking far and wide with enthusiasm out the windshield of our car, or squinting to see the view of past mistakes or rejections out the rear-view mirror? God wants us looking forward, moving forward…living forward.

The answer is simple, I decided: I have to want it badly enough! I have to want my dream enough to endure the pain. To make the sacrifice. To say ‘no’ to some things, and ‘yes’ to others. I can’t imagine the obstacles that jogger must have faced in order to gain the strength, the courage and the endurance to run again. He didn’t care how he might have looked to the world; it was focus, determination and the belief that he was fighting for something bigger than himself that kept him standing there on the corner waiting to cross.

That’s why it’s so important not to waiver in your decision to pursue that which brings you joy. There will be rejections and obstacles in your path that will only work to your advantage if you never lose site of your goal. The light at the end of the tunnel still burns even while you’re knee-deep in negativity. Opposition can present itself in many forms, so cultivate good habits and good relationships. Surround yourself with those who want to experience your success right along with you. And keep moving forward….always forward.

Habakkuk 2:3- "But these things I plan won't happen right away.

Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled.

If it seems slow, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed."

Looking Past the Weeds Today...

Sometimes, you have to think past the weeds deep into the hidden undergrowth. Even in the tangled, untidy mess of things, there’s life determined to bloom; determined to be. And I have to decide which is the stronger of the two. Do I succumb to the weeds bent in a desperate attempt to choke out the life and the beauty, or do I hold on to the hope that with a little work, a little pain and effort, the full glory of God will be revealed?

It’s a day for dreaming big. A day for thinking past the weeds and far beyond the hurdles, deep into the blessing.

For me, it’s a day to live out what I’ve been blogging all this time, to step out in faith on my own words - it’s a day to pray for and believe in the courage to fly!

Won’t you join with me in prayer for ALL of us, my sweet sisters in Christ, who may be seeking that inner strength and belief today? Because of Jesus – the courage is already ours!

Lord Jesus,

Bless the reader of these words today. Bless her with the courage to fly, to dream sweeter and bigger and brighter than her mind can fathom. Thank you for the dreams and goals You place before each of us, and may You breathe life over each one. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you,

for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all

the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me."

2 Corinthians 12:9 ESV

"But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect,"

1 Peter 3:15 ESV