The grandeur of the room caught me a little off guard. The invitation said “dressy attire,” but I have to say, between the butler, the pre-printed name cards all in a row, the roaring fire in the massive stone fireplace and ornate columns, the many, many tables draped in pristine white, the servers parading through like little robots in single file, the sparkle of pure silver and crystal gleaming from each table and the abundance of apparently well-to-do dinner attendees…I felt a bit out of place.
I spent the next 3 hours very held in, feeling restrained, stiff and uncomfortable. I leaned in to hear perfect strangers trying to make small talk, but their voices mixed with a hundred other conversations taking place about the room.
I smiled an uneasy smile, sipped my iced tea glass dry and wondered why I ever decided to show up to something that clearly wasn’t “me”. What was God thinking to direct me to such a place where being myself would probably raise a few eyebrows and maybe even get me a follow up postcard stating that after careful consideration, perhaps I wasn’t a good fit for their group.
Have you ever felt like that? You find yourself in a situation or an environment where you feel like you’ve been transported to a completely different planet and your only flight home has just left? It’s the stuff bad dreams are made of.
God has a plan and I know it.
I believe in it as I live it each and every day.
I may not have the answers today; may not have a clue as to why I would find myself at such an event, but the answers will come – they always do.
I’ll have that aha! moment where all the pieces will fit together and make perfect sense. That moment when I realize how He truly is in each and every detail of my life including the decisions I make.
I want to thank you for every situation in which I find myself. Thank you for every experience and every lesson learned. I pray for your continued presence in my life and for walking with me through this journey. You are so good to me!
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds,3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. 6 But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.
(James 1:2-8) NIV